She's not so scary looking, is she? But...here's my other embarrassing confession: I've only ever ridden one-speed bikes. Growing up I always rode my older sisters' bikes, which were old one-speeds. I may have ridden a more advanced bike for a year or two but it was the kind where you shift gears by backpedaling, and my neighborhood was flat so I never needed to change gears. So here I am, a grown woman, and I don't know how to properly ride a big girl bike.
I went for my first ride on the new girl on Thursday, and it was not quite what I hoped it would be. Third embarrassing confession of the day: I've only ridden a non-stationary bike twice in the past two years. Prior to that it had been fifteen years since I'd been on a bike as a child. So, my confidence and balance need some work. I puttered around my neighborhood for a couple of miles just trying to get my legs under me. When I was riding smoothly it was pretty awesome. I need to get used to being on a road bike with the low handlebars, and I kept straining my neck trying to be bent over while still maintaining a clear view of the road over my glasses. Note to self: Next time, wear contacts.
Biggest hurdle: I literally do not know how to ride a bike with gears. I would get to a hill and the bike would.not.move. Clearly I was in the wrong gear, and I didn't know how to fix it. I tried flipping through the gear shifts and trying to find the right one, but it just wasn't working. And you know how I am about what I perceive to be failure.
So here I sit on a 50+ degree day, talking myself out of going bike riding. I know that I just need to get over the hurdle of figuring out gear shifting and then I'll feel great, but until then I'm panicking and wondering if I'm really going to be ready for a triathlon in mid-April. What if I can't bike up hills? What if I get a flat and don't know how to patch it? What if my chain jumps off and I don't know how to fix it. What if I can't finish my first tri?!?!?!?!
Deep breaths. Combined with my swimming weakness I'm sitting here having a serious tri panic. Does everyone go through this? I was feeling super confident just last week after I did a mini sprint tri at the gym (swam 400 yards, stationary-biked 10 miles, treadmill-ran 1.25 miles), but now I'm feeling overwhelmed.
The temperatures this weekend are supposed to be in the high-50s, low 60s both days, and the sunshine is staring me in the face like a loaded gun. I have to get out there. I WANT to get out there. But I'm afraid of failure.
I just need to man up and go. I'll figure it out. I'll get better....right?
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